Listen Hear: The Presets

Half the kitchen staff I worked with at Boston Pizza over in Banff is Australian (see pros and cons article). Since music is a big part of working in the kitchen (without it, you'd fucking loose your mind), we, the Canadian cooks had our musical horizons broadened by our Aussie compadres. Surprisingly enough, the Aussie music scene isn't half bad. In fact one of my favorite newly introduced musical acts of the year, The Presets are from the land down-under. I first heard these guys on the stereo, sweating over the salad station after a horrific dinner rush. Shout-out to my homie Adrian from tuning them in. Needless to say they got me moving right off the bat with their Depeche Mode type swag and Joy Division style vocals (I'm a sucker for new wave/early 80's electro pop music). Instantly, I was hooked. I particularly enjoyed their album "Apocalypto". The music progresses very well with a similar vibe through-out the album that manages to stay funky fresh. The vibe, the voice, the electronic integration is on point with these guys. Mad hip style (hard to avoid these days). I was stoked to hear that their touring North America real soon and stopping in Toronto on October 23rd. I'm excited to hear them perform live, especially after reading rave reviews of their performance at the Cochella music festival in 2011. Give them a listen and don't be afraid to fist pump once or twice (I know it's gay, but I could hardly help it while listening to these guys). Get hip, get down with these fucking Aussies because they are simply fantastic.

p.s. I absolutely adore this video as well. Stupendous art direction in my opinion. 

Banff: A retrospective look(back)

Well, it's official. Mill is back in Ontario (for a little while at least). Reporting to you live from a small town by the name of Kingsville (close to Windsor). I can certainly admit that I left (at least a part of) my heart in Banff. The end of my mountain venture brought on bittersweet feelings. Regret, longing to stay, but alas, it's on to the next one, as always. As i arrived in Hamilton last week, the first thing I noted is how god-damn hot it is over here. Jesus H. Fuck, is this what y'all have been dealing with all summer? I can hardly breath when I step outside. No rain, no shade, no coolness whatsoever. I definitely did not miss this humidity. No wonder hazy don't skate outside till it gets dark. Obviously I burnt the shit out of my back my first day out splashing around in a pool. I put sunscreen on and everything. There's nothing stopping this lobster-like monstrosity from surfacing.

Since I can't really enjoy the fun-filled family times outside on the back patio, I figured I'd sit back and reminisce a little about Banff, the sultry son of a gun that wined and dined me, only me to leave me high and dry, pleading for more.

River floats

Manning the reigns 

River floats are the shit. Everyone should experience at least one of these in their lifetime. Simply put, one of the gnarliest things to do on a hot summer's day. They got these "Explorer 200" floaties you can buy at the local dollar store in town. You grab one of those, a paddle or two and a case of beer and as the Canadians say, "away you go". The Bow River snakes it's way around the valley pretty good, making the trip exceptionally long and enjoyable. The locals usually drive out of town about 20 minutes, parks their cars at the drop point and send off from there. A solid float will take you on a leisurely path through forest and mountain scenery usually averaging about 4 hours in duration. Music blaring, beer drinking, and a solid crew of about 4 or 5 boats equals maximum fun for everyone. The daring sometimes even participate in a little frisbee tossing between boats. Minor problems occur when participants get too drunk to dock their floaties at the end of the float, but the easy solution is to simply abandon ship and hope for the best. 

Camping

I love camping in Ontario. I've been doing it since I was a wee 8 year old Mill. Theres just something about the mountain view, the glacier water, and the ever present wildlife that makes camping out west just so much better. The inclusion of bocce ball into the equation makes is prime as well. You ever played that shit before? It's fucking exhilarating to say the least. That's my new thing. Bocce. Yet another spectacular activity that goes great with drinking beer in the sun. I digress though, another great thing about camping out west is the careless vibe you get from people. We went to a "young person desingated" campsite in B.C. for our last night in wonderland and it was splendid. Got wasted as fuck and didn't have to worry about no 40 year old super-dads getting pissed off about "all the rap music and hollering". The place reminded me of a hippie comune. Everybody was on the same level. There was even a "campsite" dog that made it's rounds through-out the evening. He was awesome:

Oh yeah, there was a horse too. He was a little weird:

Overall, camping in the mountains was a great way to cap off 3 terrific months in Banff. Real man-like camping. Shit, it felt like I was in a Kokanee comercial or some shit. Good fucking times, eh.

Enough dreaming, back to reality now. I'm doing my rounds, travelling around Ontario. Next stop Ottawa. I'll be seeing my compadres real soon and I'll be sure to let you know how fucking retarded they've all gotten. God it's good to be home. Till next time, keep your stick on the ice.

Mill

Bryce footy

There's a few things in life you can always count on. You'll need to pay your taxes, you'll eventually end up dying and Bryce Patry will always be skating. More specifically, killing it. Skating with this dude a few weekends ago on the Gypsy tour was a reminder of that fact. Peep the latest footy from an under-rated Ottawa skater:

Grabbing Boners

Had a dope little skate session today (just thought I'd let everyone know). Met this homie by the name of Aaron who's been living in the town of Banff for quite some time. We went out for a little rip through some back alleys and he showed me what I have regrettably failed to stumble upon on my own during my stay here. Spots. Mostly jangy spots, yet spots nonetheless. You don't really get a perfect run-up nor a smooth landing all the time, but the fun is still there. After a few rough ledge slingers, we ended up skating the local park. Aaron was blasting these massive boned out grabs out of pretty much the only transition in the whole park, so I decided to document the gnarliness. Here's what i got:

I got 9 days left in Banff, then it's slowly back to the real world (Toronto, Ont.). It feels like these last 3 months have flown by pretty quick. I'll be stopping into Ottawa mid August so I'll be sure to have a skate session with the CryBaby round then. Can't fucking wait.

Pros and Cons: Aussies

This is what I know about Australia. It's located south of Japan, far the fuck away from here. So far in fact that the country is a day ahead of us (I doubt we'll ever catch up). Their seasons are all fuckered up there as well. For example while we're all cooking in 30 degree weather over here, Australian's are enjoying a brisk winter season. Their "winter" (if you can even call it that) is nothing compared to ours. Temperatures sink to a whopping +2, and never really go bellow zero. That's cold apparently. Pussies.

Uuhh, let's see, what else? Australia's economical strength lies in it's mining sector. Major exports include: coal, woodchips and natural gas. Blah blah blah. They have a chick as their prime minister (yeah, for real). It is a mandatory act for all citizens over the age of 18 to vote in federal elections. I totally agree with this law (BTW) and think that it should be implemented here in Canada. And last but certainly not least, Australia has got some of the coolest fucking animals on the planet.

Exhibit A:

  The Wombat

Kangaroos and koala bears are fucking cute as shit, there's not much sense in denying that fact. The wombat is one sick-ass, underrated creature. These little fuckers (I've been told) are deadly road-kill. The muscle mass on the average wombat is dense. Like rock-hard dense. So hitting one of these fuckers with your car would do a lot of damage. There have been accounts of wombats totaling cars, just ripping them up from the bottom out, with the animal just lazily walking away from the accident. I respect an animal that can take a beating like that and casually walk away, relatively unharmed. When they do die, their legs go stiff as they fall back. Quite the sight.

I digress. I'm writing this post to weigh the pros and cons of hanging out with the beautiful (yet sometimes misguided) people that come from "The Land Down Unda". I've met a few Aussies in my short time on this rock, some I'm even fortunate to call my good friends. They're great people, honestly, but like everyone else they have their "moments" (so to say). So, I have compiled a list of both positive and negative attributes for one of my favorite nationalities ever. 

Pro's:

- Aussies (in Canada) attract women like fucking Justin Bieber naturally attracts any girl bellow the age of 18. It's crazy, I mean if you're in search of a solid wing-man, look no further than your Aussie mate. 

- They're very caring people. I met my friend Morgan King in Banff close to 3 years ago. When i arrived in town, I didn't have a place to stay. Within a few hours of hanging out with The King, he and his roommate graciously offered up a room for me to stay in their apartment. I was so stoked on that, since then Morgan and I have been good friends, the kind that won't see each other for months and yet revert right back to square one upon reunion. LLTK 

- Aussies know how to party. Period. Just ask this kid:

Exhibit B:

- They got this cool-ass slang they use, where they find words that rhyme with what they're really trying to say. I.e. Your misses = your hugs and kisses

- Aussies love to travel. The need and want to explore new lands is somehow embedded in their DNA. If you're looking for adventure, look no further than a Crocodile Hunter looking, motherfucking Aussie. Unlike a lot of people I know back in Ottawa (who have little to no ambition when it comes to leaving their little bubble behind) Aussies are always down to experience new things. 

Cons:

- I hate to say it, and I can already hear the chirp-backs, but Aussies can get a tad obnoxious at times (especially when they're "native drunk"). They don't mean anything by it, they're just having a good time, but seriously enough is fucking enough sometimes. Almost biting your homies ear off is not necessarily the best way to show him your love. God, and that whole "Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, Oi, Oi, Oi" chant gets old real quick.

- Often I cannot understand a fucking word those fuckers are saying. It sucks especially when communication is a big part of your job. When you have to ask the dude you're working with to repeat himself over and over again, you kind of feel like a douche. How am I supposed to know what "heaps" means?

- Aussies (for the most part) love to show off. They're a confident bunch, that's for sure. Personally, I consider my modesty a point of pride. 

- Vegemite is quite possibly one of the most bland and uninteresting things I have ever had the displeasure of tasting. Shame on you Australia, shame on you. 

I'm not a hater. Just telling it how it is. I love you Australia and I can't wait to visit you someday. Shout-out to all my Aussie friends. Here's some midnight oil to calm you down:

Banff Update

Hazy's not the only one with a CPR qualification under his belt (lifeguard, 6 years, how you like me now?). The blog has been dwindling, it's true, but fear not, for Mill's here to update y'all on the haps in Banff, Alberta.
First off, let me just say that unfortunately I feel extremely detached from the skate world as of late. I mean, sure there are some decent skaters in town, and when I say decent, I mean fucking killer. Nice dudes too.  Most of them have what I like to call, a "snowboarder" style. You know, baggy ass clothes, long ass hair, shoulder slouch, head down, pretty much Brian Wenning(ish).
Exhibit A:

They all skate for fun, and they have a great time doing so, but it seems like everyone in this town is way more into snow-slushin, than side-walk surfin. Even the "skate-shops" in town seem 'out of the loop' (so to say). Trying to hold up a conversation about skateboarding with the random Aussie at the counter of a local shop here is like me trying to spit game about disc golf (apparently a more popular past-time in Banff). I mean, if you work at a skate-shop and claim to skateboard, "like, everyday, mate", why the perplexed look when mentioning such milestone videos such as Stay Gold. Clueless, simply clueless. But hey, I can't complain too much. At least we have a skate-park in town:

The ground is rough, and they stripped the mini-ramp pretty much right when I got there, but it's still shredable. The town of Canmore (just about a half an hour down the highway) has got an unreal park. Concrete errything, massive 3 section bowl with 12 foot walls, wallie combo options, tight tranny galore. I had the great pleasure of shredding this beauty on Go Skateboarding Day.

I've really been enjoying the sights, sounds, and smells of the west. I missed the view of the beautiful mountains while living in Toronto. They are truly breathtaking. As gay as it sounds, I've been really into nature walks. You know, just embracing nature, basking in it's wonderful power. It's hard not to be inspired when you got a monstrous landscape that surrounds you at all times.

The art has been flowing. Went out and made an offering to the gods of steel:

Canvases for friends I've made along the way:

Skateboards. So hot right now

Strange Boats // Work Your Pussy

30 compressions 2 breaths

Wawrzinsquatch has been stagnant recently. Thank god I am officially CPR qualified and can revive this blog back to life! Amongst the bull shit City of Ottawa training I've been up to and looking for a research job I've most certainly been neglecting our little piece of the web here. However, when I receive a picture such as this one: (Longboarder racing at 130 km/h) with a caption such as :"They put a dildo on a string in front of him and he just took off" (Thanks Rock hands) I appreciate having a place to share it with our little audience. I love not holding back. I also love this blog and hope to post more often.

Lurkman Speaks the Truth

We passed over what seamed to be a little detail, but turned out to be an eternal truth. "whats the sickest thing about living in England compared to Canada" - No hesitation, "Kebab shops".

Maximum trust. 

Home is where the heart is

I first saw this concept go down on some stupid-ass Bam Margera show a few years back (ramps inside a house). The European version of that shit seen above is 10 times gnalier/sexier. The video has me craving for some home shredding of my own after viewing it. That fireplace 5-0 is killer, enough said.